Let me just slip this in there before I get to my main point: I am SO not a Bruce Willis fan. My hubby has seen all the D.H. movies from the first one (Die Hard) to the last one (Dear God, what are you a cat? Die Hard already!!). If I never see another Bruce Willis action flick, I’m cool, thanks.
Ok, so habits. Old habits. Old, bad habits. They die hard, that’s fer darn sure! I mean, if you’re a smoker or a drug user or a nail biter, you know what I’m talking about, right? You go for weeks, months maybe, smokin’, tokin’ or bitin’ and then one day you wake up and declare this day to be THE DAY when you’re gonna put an end to it! And that lasts for all of a day, until your boss pisses you off, or the kids drive you nuts, or some jerk cuts you off on the highway. So, it’s right back to smokin’, tokin’ or bitin’.
Hmm? What’s that?? Oh. You wanna know my old, bad habit. Well. It’s eating. Sure, yeh, I know we all gotta eat, but it’s how I eat and when I eat. It’s not that I eat a lot. Unless, I’m upset. Really upset. Sad, sitting in my room trying to ignore the world kind of upset.
Hi, my name is Bella, and I’m an Emotional Eater. *Hi Bella!*
Ever since I was a child, I found my comfort in food. Not just any food, I had my favourites, my “go to” foods. Cheese slices, whipped cream (straight from the can, of course!), cereal. There weren’t a lot of snacks at my house like chips and such, but I would just eat a lot of whatever appealed to me. And it wasn’t just a habit it was also a secret. No one knew. No one could know! Like sneaking a puff or two of a cig before you step in the house, and stomping it out, while you pop some gum in your mouth. No one can know.
It’s been a loooong climb uphill for me, to find ways to deal with my emotions, in a way that doesn’t involve feeding them. It’s not easy, because I’m pretty much a private person. I actual feel better writing things down than I do talking about them. I suppose this is why blogging is something that speaks to me. Some days I sort of give in and have a little extra of something nice, just because it makes me feel good. But I don’t overindulge the way I did years ago.
It’s one day at a time.